For a host of legal and practical reasons, LGBTQ+ parents often need to approach estate planning in some distinct ways. As a result, if you are part of the LGTBQ+ community – regardless of whether you are married, in a domestic partnership or co-parenting without a formal legal relationship – know that taking certain proactive steps can help ensure your wishes are honored and your children are protected in the event of your death or incapacity.
There is no doubt that estate planning can be a stressful process, not least because it compels people to think about a time when they will no longer be able to support their loved ones in person. However, taking thoughtful steps now can serve as an act of both love for others and self-respect in re: your needs and personal values.
Important considerations
One of the most important considerations for LGBTQ+ parents is legal parentage. If only one parent is biologically or legally recognized, the other parent may not have automatic rights without proper documentation. In many cases, adoption or a court order is necessary to establish legal parent status. Estate planning cannot create legal parentage, but it can reinforce your intentions and offer added security.
Naming a guardian for your children is also important. A will allows you to designate who should care for your children if something happens to you. Without this, the court may choose a guardian without regard to your preferences. This step can be especially important for LGBTQ+ parents whose families of origin may not be supportive or may challenge the surviving parent’s role.
Creating a trust can help manage assets for your children and avoid probate. A trust allows you to set rules for how and when your children receive funds and can protect your estate from delays or disputes. Naming a trusted person as trustee, rather than defaulting to a court-appointed administrator, can help keep decision-making in line with your values.
It is also wise to create powers of attorney and health care directives. These documents allow your partner or chosen representative to make decisions for you in the event of illness or incapacity. Without them, hospitals and financial institutions may not recognize a non-biological or non-marital partner’s authority.
Laws vary by state, and while many protections have improved, gaps and inconsistencies still exist. A tailored estate plan can offer peace of mind, reduce the risk of family conflict and help to better ensure that your children’s future is secure.